This appeared as a Google ad result when I searched for 'climate change' yesterday. It makes me feel despair.
For those whose appetites have been whet by the mysery of this 'unique relationship', here's where the link takes you.
7.29.2010
Gem of the day
This appeared as a Google ad result when I searched for 'climate change' yesterday. It makes me feel despair.
For those whose appetites have been whet by the mysery of this 'unique relationship', here's where the link takes you.
7.28.2010
Another non-environmental wonder
This is mind-blowingly awkward.
"David Cameron will lead a heavyweight cabinet and business delegation to India on Tuesday in what diplomats admit could be a delicate mission to build a “new special relationship” between London and New Delhi."
And yes, other people have noticed:
"Some diplomats are queasy at the idea in the coalition agreement that Britain should seek 'a new special relationship with India'."
The accompanying photograph, above, is the cherry on the cake.
Bonus bonus gem
Ed Gillespie, co-founder of Futerra Sustainability Communications, on what 'model' of CSR Tony Hayward could possibly have been referring to yesterday:
"It probably looks like an airplane kit clumsily assembled by a 4-year old high on glue."
"It probably looks like an airplane kit clumsily assembled by a 4-year old high on glue."
Bonus gem
We can always count on the New York Times for two things: snarky comments hidden deep in most of the articles, and unintentionally ironic quotes.
Here's one about BP's 'game-changing' replacement of Hayward:
"The change in leadership did not alter the tone at the top of the company. On Tuesday, Mr. Dudley, just like Mr. Hayward, insisted that BP had not been negligent in its offshore operations."
And what did Dudley say, exactly?
“It’s a very complicated industrial accident,” Mr. Dudley said during a telephone interview with reporters. It resulted from “a series of individual misjudgments by very experienced people and a multiple series of failures of equipment and processes of using equipment that is going to involve multiple companies here.”
You're right Dudley, it is a very complicated accident. But it didn't result from a series of 'individual misjudgements', that's for sure. Try a two decade-long record of total disregard for environmental and social impact, including the largest fine in the history of the US OSHA. for lack of compliance.
I'm just going to go ahead and state the obvious: Dudley is a dud.
Here's one about BP's 'game-changing' replacement of Hayward:
"The change in leadership did not alter the tone at the top of the company. On Tuesday, Mr. Dudley, just like Mr. Hayward, insisted that BP had not been negligent in its offshore operations."
And what did Dudley say, exactly?
“It’s a very complicated industrial accident,” Mr. Dudley said during a telephone interview with reporters. It resulted from “a series of individual misjudgments by very experienced people and a multiple series of failures of equipment and processes of using equipment that is going to involve multiple companies here.”
You're right Dudley, it is a very complicated accident. But it didn't result from a series of 'individual misjudgements', that's for sure. Try a two decade-long record of total disregard for environmental and social impact, including the largest fine in the history of the US OSHA. for lack of compliance.
I'm just going to go ahead and state the obvious: Dudley is a dud.
Gem of the day
GreenBiz provides us, quite literally, with food for thought as it shoots us this question:
"Are Your Cheeseburgers Causing Deforestation?"
In a word: whatever.
"Are Your Cheeseburgers Causing Deforestation?"
In a word: whatever.
7.27.2010
UBER GEM
More glimpses into the crazy, deranged place that is Tony Hayward's mind. Affirming, at last, that he is indeed completely out of touch with reality, here's what he said to grace his departure:
"I believe this tragedy will leave BP a different company. I believe for it to move on in the United States it needs new leadership and it is for that reason I have stood down as the CEO. I think BP's response to this tragedy has been a model of good social corporate responsibility. It has mounted an unprecedented response."
But wait, it gets even better. What does his replacement, ol' Dudley, have to say about BP's record and future:
Dudley, who will become BP's first American boss, described the company's reaction to the blowout on the Deepwater Horizon as an "unprecedented corporate response" adding that very few companies could have done what it did.
Well you're right in a profoundly unintended way there, Dudley--few companies could have done what you did, indeed. Few could have gotten it so utterly wrong. Fewer still could exhale a satisfied breath as their beleaguered CEO exited bragging about his company's 'responsibility' in the face of the largest environmental disaster in US history.
"I believe this tragedy will leave BP a different company. I believe for it to move on in the United States it needs new leadership and it is for that reason I have stood down as the CEO. I think BP's response to this tragedy has been a model of good social corporate responsibility. It has mounted an unprecedented response."
But wait, it gets even better. What does his replacement, ol' Dudley, have to say about BP's record and future:
Dudley, who will become BP's first American boss, described the company's reaction to the blowout on the Deepwater Horizon as an "unprecedented corporate response" adding that very few companies could have done what it did.
Well you're right in a profoundly unintended way there, Dudley--few companies could have done what you did, indeed. Few could have gotten it so utterly wrong. Fewer still could exhale a satisfied breath as their beleaguered CEO exited bragging about his company's 'responsibility' in the face of the largest environmental disaster in US history.
Gem of the day
Today, a stunningly coordinated performance by Greenpeace UK as strategic teams shut down BP petrol stations across the country.
But for the actual gem, well, here it is (don't worry mates, BP is on top of these shenanigans):
‘BP has said that it is aware that some "irresponsible acts" have taken place and there has been "some interference with safety equipment".’
7.26.2010
Bonus bonus gem
Can someone please clarify for me why BP has yet to update its Twitter feed from what is pictured above. Isn't the whole purpose of Twitter to provide timely, short updates on key decisions? Decisions such as, I don't know, replacing the CEO of BP? According to the New York Times, certain management decisions have, indeed, been made today...
Bonus gem
This is a whopper.
Shokri Ghanem, the head of Libya’s national oil company, responding to concerns over the environmental impacts of deep-water drilling in European Union waters in 2007:
"You don’t stop flying because of a plane crash," said Ghanem, who signed the 2007 deal with Mr Hayward in the presence of Tony Blair, then UK prime minister.
And the cherry on the cake is probably this:
"In the event of a disaster off Libya, BP said it had 'detailed contingency plans in place, a multitiered response'."
Shokri Ghanem, the head of Libya’s national oil company, responding to concerns over the environmental impacts of deep-water drilling in European Union waters in 2007:
"You don’t stop flying because of a plane crash," said Ghanem, who signed the 2007 deal with Mr Hayward in the presence of Tony Blair, then UK prime minister.
And the cherry on the cake is probably this:
"In the event of a disaster off Libya, BP said it had 'detailed contingency plans in place, a multitiered response'."
Gem of the day
Marketing Magazine continues to deliver gem after gem. Today, we are served up this beauty:
"Pepsi's BP oil spill activity praised by CSR experts"
Let's take a step back and recall just what the parameters around the Refresh Project submissions were for the Gulf of Mexico addition:
"There are a number of requirements for potential ideas--most notably, they can't be related directly to environmental impact and clean-up efforts. Instead, projects have to impact local communities and be executable within a year."
No environmental benefits? So what is so laudable about these Kumabayah-singing initiatives? According to the 'CSR experts':
"They aren't over-reaching or over-sentimentalising. There are no photographs of birds covered in oil or ruined beaches or stars and stripes."
And, wait for it, the clincher:
"In CSR in general honesty is the single most important element of any branded work."
"Pepsi's BP oil spill activity praised by CSR experts"
Let's take a step back and recall just what the parameters around the Refresh Project submissions were for the Gulf of Mexico addition:
"There are a number of requirements for potential ideas--most notably, they can't be related directly to environmental impact and clean-up efforts. Instead, projects have to impact local communities and be executable within a year."
No environmental benefits? So what is so laudable about these Kumabayah-singing initiatives? According to the 'CSR experts':
"They aren't over-reaching or over-sentimentalising. There are no photographs of birds covered in oil or ruined beaches or stars and stripes."
And, wait for it, the clincher:
"In CSR in general honesty is the single most important element of any branded work."
7.25.2010
Gem of the day
The superficial BP commentary continues to spew. Here's an analyst quoted in today's New York Times, completely missing the point:
Bruce Lanni, an energy portfolio strategist at Nollenberger Capital Partners, said the fact that no more oil was spilling the gulf was “an inflection point” for BP.
“There are a lot of good things now going in BP’s favor,” Mr. Lanni said. “There has been an overreaction to the cost of the spill. BP has the opportunity to emerge as a stronger company. I think this is where investors are missing a window of opportunity.”
Bruce Lanni, an energy portfolio strategist at Nollenberger Capital Partners, said the fact that no more oil was spilling the gulf was “an inflection point” for BP.
“There are a lot of good things now going in BP’s favor,” Mr. Lanni said. “There has been an overreaction to the cost of the spill. BP has the opportunity to emerge as a stronger company. I think this is where investors are missing a window of opportunity.”
7.23.2010
Bonus gem
America shows us the goods:
"About 30 protesters blocked traffic, many wearing T-shirts that said “Stop the Hate.” Several unfurled a large, white banner that blared “Stop SB1070. We will not comply.” Others in the group held a banner in Spanish saying: “There is no problem with immigration; there is a problem with capitalism. Revolution is the solution.” After two hours, the police cleared the intersection and arrested seven people."
"About 30 protesters blocked traffic, many wearing T-shirts that said “Stop the Hate.” Several unfurled a large, white banner that blared “Stop SB1070. We will not comply.” Others in the group held a banner in Spanish saying: “There is no problem with immigration; there is a problem with capitalism. Revolution is the solution.” After two hours, the police cleared the intersection and arrested seven people."
7.22.2010
Bonus bonus bonus gem
Hold onto your pants for this one. What did Newsweek say when it ranked Marathon Oil as #1 in the oil industry for responsibility on its 2009 Green Rankings?
"Oil companies are generally not poster children for the environment. Marathon stands out in its industry, however, by generally avoiding the controversies and enforcement actions plaguing other oil giants."
Avoiding? Right.
"Oil companies are generally not poster children for the environment. Marathon stands out in its industry, however, by generally avoiding the controversies and enforcement actions plaguing other oil giants."
Avoiding? Right.
Bonus bonus gem
Occasionally I come across a particularly virulent example of the Ultimate No-nos for CSR Reporting. This one just cruised straight into my inbox.
This page, which comes from National Bank of Abu Dhabi, represents a total identity vaccuum. If you didn't know the company who produced it before reading it, you would still have absolutely no clue afterwards. It uses 100% generic language and has no visual identity to support it.
Ironically, they frame the page as 'What sustainability means to us'. I'd reframe it as 'What sustainability means to Wikipedia.'
Bonus gem
For today's bonus gem, let's take a trip back to the glorious harkening of the millenium.
In 2000, our lovely comrades at Innovest published "The Petroleum Industry: hidden risks and value potential for financiers and investors", an industry sector report which highlighted "the environmentally-driven risks and opportunities found in the 13 oil companies of the S&P 500."
And who came out on top? Royal Dutch Shell, with BP at a "close second". And what did Innovest have to say?
"Shell and BP have superior environmental management programs, particularly the level of engagement in sustainable development and triple bottom line issues," said Dr. Martin Whittaker, Senior Analyst at Innovest.
Ah yes. And for the clincher, here's what Innovest says the value of their report is:
"Concerned investors will find Innovest's report a valuable indicator of future performance in the oil industry based on environmental criteria."
In 2000, our lovely comrades at Innovest published "The Petroleum Industry: hidden risks and value potential for financiers and investors", an industry sector report which highlighted "the environmentally-driven risks and opportunities found in the 13 oil companies of the S&P 500."
And who came out on top? Royal Dutch Shell, with BP at a "close second". And what did Innovest have to say?
"Shell and BP have superior environmental management programs, particularly the level of engagement in sustainable development and triple bottom line issues," said Dr. Martin Whittaker, Senior Analyst at Innovest.
Ah yes. And for the clincher, here's what Innovest says the value of their report is:
"Concerned investors will find Innovest's report a valuable indicator of future performance in the oil industry based on environmental criteria."
Gem of the day
A real wonder of a headline today from Environmental Leader:
"Federal Prisons to Reduce Water Use by 42%"
Let's revisit the classic Venn diagram of sustainability: the unity of economic, environmental, and social. So that pretty much covers an attempt at fulfilling environmental, with a touch of economic through efficiency cost savings.
Social? Right. One step at a time for America.
"Federal Prisons to Reduce Water Use by 42%"
Let's revisit the classic Venn diagram of sustainability: the unity of economic, environmental, and social. So that pretty much covers an attempt at fulfilling environmental, with a touch of economic through efficiency cost savings.
Social? Right. One step at a time for America.
7.21.2010
Bonus gem
Today is a BP day. Warning: this is also a gem that may hurt and cause nausea. BP finally rolls out a formal apology, admitting to doctoring a photo to enhance activity at its Gulf oil spill command center in Houston. What happened?
"[BP] spokesman Scott Dean said yesterday that three screens were blank in the original picture and a staff photographer used Photoshop software to add images."
But wait, it gets better. There's no press release on the BP site (this would call too much attention to it, naturally--being BP, they'll just let the story run like wildfire through the blogosphere and then inexorably spread to the front pages of every major newspaper and newswire service in the world). But there are additional spokesman 'comments', such as this winner:
'"We've instructed our post-production team to refrain from doing this in the future," said the spokesman in an e-mail to the Washington Post.'
And this winner:
"Mr Dean added that the photographer was showing off his Photoshop skills and there was no ill intent."
Gem of the day
This is a serious gem. Not just because it's almost too gem-like to be believed, but because the subject matter is extremely serious. As the New York Times reports:
"Despite the April 20 Deepwater Horizon disaster, BP has no plans to leave the Gulf of Mexico or stop drilling for oil in other deep ocean waters."
What? Right.
"Although BP, based in London, could have raised the funds by selling valuable deepwater assets, it decided to dispose of onshore assets instead. Analysts say the choice shows that BP is committed to deepwater drilling."
Someone explain to me just how the company is managing to continue its total lack of regard for even the most basic forms of risk management in its core business operations. Calling Congress: this is yours to clean up now.
And before we adjourn this painful gem of the day, here's the two real zingers The Times delivers:
"The Deepwater Horizon accident has gravely damaged BP’s reputation. Even if the company can contain the political damage, its growth will be stunted by its need to save cash to pay for the spill."
“BP will probably end up a more humble company,” said Brian Youngberg, an energy analyst at Edward Jones, a brokerage firm based in St. Louis.
Memo to Jad Mouad: Please stop reading Marketing Magazine. This is Beyond Reputation.
Memo to Brian Youngberg: You're fired.
"Despite the April 20 Deepwater Horizon disaster, BP has no plans to leave the Gulf of Mexico or stop drilling for oil in other deep ocean waters."
What? Right.
"Although BP, based in London, could have raised the funds by selling valuable deepwater assets, it decided to dispose of onshore assets instead. Analysts say the choice shows that BP is committed to deepwater drilling."
Someone explain to me just how the company is managing to continue its total lack of regard for even the most basic forms of risk management in its core business operations. Calling Congress: this is yours to clean up now.
And before we adjourn this painful gem of the day, here's the two real zingers The Times delivers:
"The Deepwater Horizon accident has gravely damaged BP’s reputation. Even if the company can contain the political damage, its growth will be stunted by its need to save cash to pay for the spill."
“BP will probably end up a more humble company,” said Brian Youngberg, an energy analyst at Edward Jones, a brokerage firm based in St. Louis.
Memo to Jad Mouad: Please stop reading Marketing Magazine. This is Beyond Reputation.
Memo to Brian Youngberg: You're fired.
7.20.2010
Bonus bonus gem
Let's face it, Web 2.0 is a mixed bag. On one level, it's kind of bringing us closer to democracy. On another more cynical level, it's constantly furnishing us with gems--gems which exemplify just how little value can be added through social media (sometimes). I came across this one, excerpted below, in response to a blog by a CSR professional:
"Elaine, Thanks for this intelligent research. I am starting to wonder if we in CSR and Sustainability can create story boards that counteract the press and media's reports that disempower the possibility of change...
I now believe we should start course for the new media in how to spark this kind of engagement, so less money is invested to fuel the pace of fury that the press creates as an obstacle to real education that can result in the change we need for ESG."
Ah yes, the sorry sound of jargon drifting through the CSR breeze...
"Elaine, Thanks for this intelligent research. I am starting to wonder if we in CSR and Sustainability can create story boards that counteract the press and media's reports that disempower the possibility of change...
I now believe we should start course for the new media in how to spark this kind of engagement, so less money is invested to fuel the pace of fury that the press creates as an obstacle to real education that can result in the change we need for ESG."
Ah yes, the sorry sound of jargon drifting through the CSR breeze...
Bonus gem
More temptations from Total Energy's ingeniously framed 2009 'Environment and Society' report. I just can't help myself, so let's take a look at the cover page and reflect together on what a trainwreck this visual concept is. As a whole, the report is essentially a guide to greenwashing. More to come on that, though. For the meantime, count 'em, folks: that's 5.69 MB of Total Crap.
Gem of the day
Dear GreenBiz,
Please stop the pun chaos. It is causing me extreme distress and nausea on a regular basis. Today's highlight:
"Kaiser Coughs Up $1M for Green Health Clinic"
Environment-related humor is already dubious enough in and of itself.
Please stop the pun chaos. It is causing me extreme distress and nausea on a regular basis. Today's highlight:
"Kaiser Coughs Up $1M for Green Health Clinic"
Environment-related humor is already dubious enough in and of itself.
7.19.2010
Another non-environmental wonder
Representative John A. Boehner of Ohio, the House Republican leader, on the president’s financial regulation plan: “[like] killing an ant with a nuclear weapon.”
Bonus gem
It's finally here, everyone: Total Energy's annual CSR bonanza of reporting splendor. I'll pursue a larger scale investigation shortly, but today allow us to briefly examine what they have to say about their corporate ad campaigns, since--quite unusually--they've dedicated an entire page to discussing their objective for their climate change communications effort.
Leaving aside the obvious irony that the company has branded this segment 'Total Saga' (it's beyond a saga, really, but whatever), what's their objective?
"...designed to build and enhance our corporate image by our various stakeholders."
Right.
Gem of the day
One of the two feckless men behind the wondrous CO2 is Green campaign, H. Leyton Steward, has many and mighty connections to the oil and coal industries. But what about his other, lesser-known feats? What about--ah yes--the reality that he is a co-author of the "Sugar Busters!" dieting books?
Mm, I can taste the pollution from here.
7.16.2010
Bonus bonus gem
This is real. Ah, harkening back to the good ol' glory days, when the entire developing world was lying in wait for BP to exploit--oh sorry, I meant to say 'explore'. Hey guys, remember colonialism? Awkward.
I can't decide what feature of this report is the most gem-worthy. It's a toss-up between the statement 'India: Land of opportunity' or the fact that the page is titled 'Recipe for Success'. Then again, maybe the ultimate winner has to be this pun: 'Lubricating the market'
Something that's actually good
It's not a gem--it's crap that's actually good.
http://twitter.com/GreenPRcrap
That's excellent work.
http://twitter.com/GreenPRcrap
That's excellent work.
Bonus gem
Dear Dell,
Nice case study. But I have a question: where did 7-Eleven's 2,800 old laptops go once they were replaced with newer shinier ones?
Right.
Gem of the day
It's been a long, gem-filled week. Let's take a step back and have a thoughtful moment about the role of design in the sustainability industry (it is indeed an industry, at least for marketing and CSR, at this point). I've had enough of sexy, abstract imagery--like this tantalizing, moist 'drop of water' which accompanies what would otherwise be a basic article.
From Hess Corporation's inexcusable abuse of developing country scenes to mind-numbing examples like this one, here's my crusading moment: stop the pain. It's time to capitalize on the power of design to tell a story, not to accompany text meaninglessly.
7.15.2010
Bonus bonus bonus gem
Oh yes they did. Behold the sumptuous cover of the 2009 Hess sustainability report. And in one fell swoop, the biggest shout out to Equitorial Guinea that any multinational company has made in...forever?
Hess, your report stinks of Colonial Boardroom fever. I wholeheartedly reject it.
Bonus gem
No comment. This is a serious issue. Between unreal, oil and coal-backed campaigns like this, and Joe Romm (climate change comms pioneer) attacking Vinod Khosla (renewable energy investment pioneer), I fear for the future of America--it's not looking sustainable.
Gem of the day
BP Senior Advisor Charles Nicholson, in a 2002 speech to CSR Europe General Assembly:
"The boundaries to corporate social responsibility are conceptual. A companys primary responsibility is to its shareholders, to its owners."
"The boundaries to corporate social responsibility are conceptual. A companys primary responsibility is to its shareholders, to its owners."
7.14.2010
Bonus bonus gem
'Surprise' of the day: Philip Morris really, really needs an ethics code. Like, a real one.
Bonus gem
Harvard's Corporate Responsibility Initiative takes a crack at mapping the connections between the evolution of corporate accountability and the evolution of the Internet into Web 2.0. The results are, not surprisingly, terrifying from a design point of view.
Harvard, let's talk. After all, I am a professional.
Gem of the day
More 'awkward moments' from the trainwreck which is BP's glossy CSR legacy. Today we're treated to this whopper of a headline:
"Social Funds and BP: How Embarrassing!"
Obvious issues with that headline aside, we're left to think about the impact on social funds from BP's [previously] solid standing on the Dow Jones Sustainability Index, Legg Mason Social Awareness Fund, and plenty of others.
So what does the article conclude? "The BP-SRI connection...suggests that any investor in a mutual fund that calls itself socially responsible, sustainable, green, blue or any other color would do well to dig deep beneath the magazine ads and website fluff to understand what the fund is really all about."
Strongly disagree. The BP-SRI connection is not an 'alert' to saavy investors that they should be picking their funds wisely with due research. It's a wake-up call to the entire SRI industry. I guarantee BP is not the only example of funds which are [some unknowingly, some not] investing in oil companies with fundamentally unsustainable core products and services. The SRI industry is successful because of the CSR community--and the CSR community played a key role in getting us here with the BP disaster.
"Social Funds and BP: How Embarrassing!"
Obvious issues with that headline aside, we're left to think about the impact on social funds from BP's [previously] solid standing on the Dow Jones Sustainability Index, Legg Mason Social Awareness Fund, and plenty of others.
So what does the article conclude? "The BP-SRI connection...suggests that any investor in a mutual fund that calls itself socially responsible, sustainable, green, blue or any other color would do well to dig deep beneath the magazine ads and website fluff to understand what the fund is really all about."
Strongly disagree. The BP-SRI connection is not an 'alert' to saavy investors that they should be picking their funds wisely with due research. It's a wake-up call to the entire SRI industry. I guarantee BP is not the only example of funds which are [some unknowingly, some not] investing in oil companies with fundamentally unsustainable core products and services. The SRI industry is successful because of the CSR community--and the CSR community played a key role in getting us here with the BP disaster.
7.13.2010
Bonus gem
More fear and loathing in the CSR rankings game. Today we have the pleasure of examining the annual Ethisphere 'World's Most Ethical Companies' scheme. I'll allow Ethisphere to introduce their ranking:
"A number of companies out there think that a good CSR program consists only of a soapbox and a bullhorn...The World’s Most Ethical Companies are the ones that go above and beyond legal minimums, bring about innovative new ideas to expand the public well being, work on reducing their carbon footprint rather than contributing to green washing and won’t be found next to the words “Billion Dollar Fine” in newspaper headlines any time in the near future."
Without further ado, a few highlights from this monument to all things corporate and ethical in 2009:
-Mattel (yes, really)
-Duke Energy
-Sempra Energy
-International Paper (wait--really? yes.)
-Caterpillar (they make 'diggers')
-John Deere (they also make 'diggers')
-McDonald’s
And if you want a more in-depth description of what, say, Caterpillar does to earn a place on this magical ranking, here it is, straight from the computer of Chief Ethics and Compliance Officer, Ed Scott:
“Our leaders work to ensure that Our Values in Action [Caterpillar’s Code of Conduct] are part of everyday life at Caterpillar,” says Scott. “They take various opportunities to incorporate Our Values in Action into their communications. In turn, Caterpillar employees are expected to know and live by Our Values in Action.”
Before we conclude this bonus gem, let's take a step back and look at what underpins all the work of Ethisphere:
"Ethisphere uniquely recognizes that even companies with less than perfect historical corporate citizenship operating records need to have their successes celebrated along the way if they decide to conscientiously improve their ethics, compliance and community practices."
BP, anyone?
Gem of the day
A moment of silence, please, for the impact of the BP disaster on the reputations of The Other Guys:
"The reputation of Shell and Esso has, so far, remained intact on the back of the oil spill. BP’s, on the other hand has plummeted from a high of 18.6 at the end of April to -2.7 in mid-May, according to YouGov BrandIndex data."
A point system for reputation? What does this even mean? We can thank the lovely industry rag Marketing Week for delivering this gem.
"The reputation of Shell and Esso has, so far, remained intact on the back of the oil spill. BP’s, on the other hand has plummeted from a high of 18.6 at the end of April to -2.7 in mid-May, according to YouGov BrandIndex data."
A point system for reputation? What does this even mean? We can thank the lovely industry rag Marketing Week for delivering this gem.
7.12.2010
Gem of the day
Best headline I've seen all week, courtesy of the fountain of wonder that is Greenbiz.com:
"Cargill to Review Palm Oil Suppliers' Sustainability Progress".
Keep us updated, Cargill, let us know how it goes. I'll be waiting with baited breath for your annual CSR pdf report next year, decorated strategically with smiling farmer faces and white lies.
"Cargill to Review Palm Oil Suppliers' Sustainability Progress".
Keep us updated, Cargill, let us know how it goes. I'll be waiting with baited breath for your annual CSR pdf report next year, decorated strategically with smiling farmer faces and white lies.
Another non-environmental wonder
Previously in this treasure chest of Gems, we've explored the wondrous white male faces of the financial services industry. Today, we delve into the equally wondrous sea of finance industry campaigners and lobbyists. And yes, I made that myself. In Microsoft Paint.
7.11.2010
Gem of the day
Warning: this one hurts. A lot.
Johnnie Burton, former director of the US Minerals Management Service (MMS) under George W. Bush (2002 to 2007), on the state of the MMS under her tenure:
"I can’t answer all these questions at this point because when I was there it seemed to work well,” Burton said.
A most excellent post by Brad Johnson at ThinkProgress describes at length how unbelievable that quote is. But just in case, like me, you lack both the time and the stomach lining to pursue that background reading, here's what you need to know:
Burton was in charge during the development of the offshore drilling plan that expanded drilling to the site of the Deepwater Horizon disaster. And the report she produced on the feasibility of that expansion explicitly stated as follows:
"...lessees have been producing oil and gas from the Central Gulf and other areas for over 50 years with a remarkable record of environmental safety. For more than 30 years, there have been no significant oil spills from platforms anywhere on the OCS. No Environmental Justice impacts from accidental oil spills are expected."
Johnnie Burton, former director of the US Minerals Management Service (MMS) under George W. Bush (2002 to 2007), on the state of the MMS under her tenure:
"I can’t answer all these questions at this point because when I was there it seemed to work well,” Burton said.
A most excellent post by Brad Johnson at ThinkProgress describes at length how unbelievable that quote is. But just in case, like me, you lack both the time and the stomach lining to pursue that background reading, here's what you need to know:
Burton was in charge during the development of the offshore drilling plan that expanded drilling to the site of the Deepwater Horizon disaster. And the report she produced on the feasibility of that expansion explicitly stated as follows:
"...lessees have been producing oil and gas from the Central Gulf and other areas for over 50 years with a remarkable record of environmental safety. For more than 30 years, there have been no significant oil spills from platforms anywhere on the OCS. No Environmental Justice impacts from accidental oil spills are expected."
7.09.2010
Bonus gem
The New York Times regales us with some energy-related humor:
"Joke: How Many D.O.E. Workers Does It Take To..."
You can guess where this is going.
"The incandescent light bulb’s days are numbered. Under federal law, the 100-watt bulbs are supposed to be taken off the shelf next year, followed later by the more common 40- and 60-watt models. But guess who’s still using them? The Department of Energy."
"Joke: How Many D.O.E. Workers Does It Take To..."
You can guess where this is going.
"The incandescent light bulb’s days are numbered. Under federal law, the 100-watt bulbs are supposed to be taken off the shelf next year, followed later by the more common 40- and 60-watt models. But guess who’s still using them? The Department of Energy."
Gem of the day
Sweet jesus. Behold one of the greatest spoofs of all time--we'll know for sure when the report comes out. From the nauseating and insulting 1990s design to the quote from Ban-ki Moon to the mind-blowing statistics. Please note, under the 'Funding' section, "Marketing strategy development for the UAE and OPEC". Good times.
7.08.2010
7.07.2010
Bonus gem
Researching the financial services sector is just turning up gem after gem. This one comes to us courtesy of Bank of America. I mean, does it get any more stereotypical than this? Thanks for superimposing your logo on top of a globe. It's really representative of your vision for a more sustainable world--definitely one with capitalism involved.
Gem of the day
The future of microfinance has arrived. And it looks like...a white European man? Thanks for the good times, Citibank.
Another non-environmental wonder
The New York Times rarely fails to serve up a multitude of gems in its Dining & Wine and Style sections, a confounding assortment of New Yorker inside jokes written in mindblowingly elite language.
So here's today's, courtesy of Dining:
"The convenience of a fridge stocked with cold, tasty meat to be repurposed with a minimum of fuss."
So here's today's, courtesy of Dining:
"The convenience of a fridge stocked with cold, tasty meat to be repurposed with a minimum of fuss."
7.06.2010
Bonus gem
Oh god this is so good. Kevin Drum at Mother Jones shows us how to 'photoshop the news'. Kevin, whoever and wherever you are, I think I love you:
"Need a picture of a pensive and lonely Barack Obama stewing over the BP oil spill? Just create one!"
Gem of the day
Dear GreenBiz,
Thank you for furnishing us with this poetic headline today:
"Gulf Disaster Blackens Spirits of Green Shoppers"
For those of us who undoubtedly lack the time or the interest to examine the magnitude of this 'blackening', here's a highlight:
"Americans' perceptions of environmental responsibility declined for two key institutions: the U.S. government and major corporations."
Ah yes, trust in government--usually so high and insurmountable in the US-of-A. Right? Erm...
Thank you for furnishing us with this poetic headline today:
"Gulf Disaster Blackens Spirits of Green Shoppers"
For those of us who undoubtedly lack the time or the interest to examine the magnitude of this 'blackening', here's a highlight:
"Americans' perceptions of environmental responsibility declined for two key institutions: the U.S. government and major corporations."
Ah yes, trust in government--usually so high and insurmountable in the US-of-A. Right? Erm...
7.05.2010
Bonus non-environmental wonder
In honor of July 4th, Hunter S. Thompson on the US-of-A:
"...a crazily inflated culture-economy that eats its heroes like hotdogs and honours them on about the same level."
"...a crazily inflated culture-economy that eats its heroes like hotdogs and honours them on about the same level."
Bonus non-environmental wonder
From our friends at Core77. Ah, the warm and fuzzy feeling of brand power, US-of-A style.
Another non-environmental wonder
CEO of company Terra Firma. No further comment on this wondrous sack of flesh, except to point out his name is Guy Hands.
7.02.2010
Bonus bonus gem
Latina Style magazine ranks top 50 companies to work for in the US annually. Leaving that first part alone (it's too easy), let's examine why McDonald's came in at #1 in 2006:
"McDonald’s is an aggressive recruiter in the Latino community and has developed a campaign designed specifically to recruit Latinas."
Right.
"McDonald’s is an aggressive recruiter in the Latino community and has developed a campaign designed specifically to recruit Latinas."
Right.
Bonus gem
Along the lines of Gem of the Day, HSBC and Morgan Stanley 'do' microfinance. Do they have the same comms team?
Gem of the day
Vicious cycle of competitor benchmarking, anyone?
Goldman Sachs: "At Goldman Sachs, we believe that a healthy environment is the foundation for a sustainable and strong economy."
HSBC: "HSBC has a long standing commitment to protecting the environment and believes it is fundamental to a thriving society and sound economy – upon which business depends."
Deutsche Bank: "Deutsche Bank aims to secure a healthy environment as well as optimal living and working conditions now and in the future for our employees, clients and shareholders."
Morgan Stanley: "Morgan Stanley recognizes that a healthy and sustainable environment is critically important to our global society, our economy, our business and our people."
Goldman Sachs: "At Goldman Sachs, we believe that a healthy environment is the foundation for a sustainable and strong economy."
HSBC: "HSBC has a long standing commitment to protecting the environment and believes it is fundamental to a thriving society and sound economy – upon which business depends."
Deutsche Bank: "Deutsche Bank aims to secure a healthy environment as well as optimal living and working conditions now and in the future for our employees, clients and shareholders."
Morgan Stanley: "Morgan Stanley recognizes that a healthy and sustainable environment is critically important to our global society, our economy, our business and our people."
Another non-environmental wonder
Whereforth for lobbying in Washington? And what does it mean for the BP catastrophe? Answer below courtesy of Rogan Kersh, a New York University professor who, according to the NY Times, 'studies lobbying'. Bummer.
“A Tony Podesta isn’t going to wave a magic wand and make all of BP’s problems go away,” he said, “but his clients are going to get a blueprint for how to succeed in official Washington."
“A Tony Podesta isn’t going to wave a magic wand and make all of BP’s problems go away,” he said, “but his clients are going to get a blueprint for how to succeed in official Washington."
7.01.2010
Another non-environmental wonder
This is how they do it in France:
-Christian Blanc, the junior minister for development of the Paris region, charged the state around $15,000 for Cuban cigars
-Earlier this year, the junior minister for cooperation and Francophony, Alain Joyandet, citing a tight schedule, spent $142,000 on a private jet to attend a Haiti reconstruction conference in Martinique
And how shall they wield the regulatory stick?
"The state will stop paying the rent on private housing and for personal expenses, ministers and junior ministers will take trains rather than planes and sleep in embassies rather then hotels; the state will cancel its annual hunts, sell some airplanes and reduce by 10,000 the number of cars it provides and by 7,000 the number of apartments or houses."
And yes, that does actually read 'annual hunts'.
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